Oct 2005

Another month has past and it’s now Nov… Time seems like flying in the working world now. Everyday it’s like go to work, wait for lunch, and waiting for the arrival of HOME SWEET HOME. I realized ever since I started this job, I start to lost contacts with a lot of friens.. I’m not trying to say that this job caused all this, I really dunno what is the real caused.

Have I really changed a lot? I am still thinking that muz probably I have already changed. Like I say I used to be very cheerful, and can smile even when I am down.. But I have no idea now why I really cant do so.. Previously, when I see new ppl, new staffs, I will smile to them, but then now, I dun have the urge to do so. Is that becoz I am no longer friendly and I start losing contacts. Who does not wan to make good new friens? I wished I could and have a really good buddy like most ppl. However, I really can’t find ways to accommodate in ppl’s room. At the point of my age, to be able to blend in to a new grp of frien, to me I find it Y not.. but to others, I dun think ppl would like to make new friends and start the whole new friendship once again.

I really start to wonder is this wat we call 寂寞 or is this 孤独 ? Seriously I dunno, I start to find things not nice as last time. I dun mind new friends but I am afraid that ppl always get the wrong idea with who I am with, esp the person themselves. I am one who does not like to reject ppl.. I feel bad if I do.. so what u can do is juz to avoid as much as I can.. However, I know guys are not clever, they always can’t get the hint.. The guy U like.. dun like u.. The guy who likes u.. U dun like tt guy.. it’s really a sad thing.. I do wish to find someone whom I like and likes me as much as each other do.. but in my love life, it nv happens so.. As in palm reading, I have only a single line in my palm.. wat they refer as 断掌.. which they all say it nv seems gd.. Do not pity me… do not lie to me.. be sincere to me.. be nice to me.. I would prefer this so..

School
School has been bored as usual.. nth much.. coz In OOP class, every week, submit lab and quiz then go back.. as for account class, been only a few lessons as his lessons are always not in my unit for exam. Well nth much in sch.. this term rather bored as there are not much ppl in class and also no project.. so this term is rather dull.

Time flies and its mid week and soon nx mth is exam already. Although I have 2 papers to take but it seems hard for me.. Serious I dun like to study.. but how many really do like to study.. haha..

Work
Well, I have already left Ramen Ten. Experience there was rather present but however, it still comes to the money problem. Talking abt money, it spoils the whole r/s I had with them. Well, they have been with them for a yr plus but yet they treat me like tt.. sad case.. my money.. talk abt my money I wanna kill them for not preparing my cheque for me. But anyway, finally I got myself out of tt shop after a yr since I last tender my resignation ltr. Well, actually somehow or rather, I did enjoy my stay there, but due to this incident, I am seriously quite pissed off.

At Teletech, I am beginning to feel secure or rather accept what it is meant to be.. Although it is not as easy as u think, but I managed to pull thru this rd and I finally have adjusted my life in here. I really have learned to open up and hopeful I can be like last time so cheerful. I really do hope that this day will come back coz I really miss the days. Maybe its becoz I got heart from previous r/s that I learn not to trust ppl esp guys, that y I am quite upset with guys and tend not be believe in wat guys tell me.

Last mth, I got my pay.. woah.. it’s full!~ What I mean is tt my pay for performance in full, tt means I got all the full incentives haha.. well, hopefully I can get my full incentives. Well, maybe I would juz continue to stay until I really cant stand the management, although I really don’t really like the environment here.

Outings
Went out a lot this mth too.. watch a lot of shows as well. So nice that I have watched the shows with my friends.. this mth I din really meet up with levis they all, coz they always like to go clubbing, so when I think of clubbing.. it juz crossed my mind….. It also seems like this few mths I have always been shopping for clothes after I get my pay.. feel so shiok each mth I have money left and not spending every single cent wat I have… though I do have savings.. tt’s exceptional.. lolx..

Movies
This mth haha.. indeed I watched a lot of shows as I have said earlier.. let me juz name them.. or rather recently…

The Wig, Juz Like Heaven, The Exorcism of Emily Rose, All About Love, Cello, Domino, Flight Plan not in sequence.. lol…

Added(Sorry I missed out lol): Shen Hua, Chang Hen Ge and I forgot again the other one lol.. :p

It seems like there are more but I juz can’t recall them.. well if u have watched it with me or u noe I have watched u can add in a comment so I can add it in nx time.. :p


Perceptions
I have always believed that nth in the world is perfect even though how nice a thing can be. Today a thing may be good, but 2molo it will turn bad. All this time I haven been happy ever since the last 2nd r/s and I believe most of the ppl know.. Perhaps r/s is one thing that I can nv have a good one.. in other words, I nv have a good r/s. So ppl.. pardon me for not trusting u all esp guys as I dun really tend to believe guys naturally.

Somehow, I seriously have to thank someone who currently has brought light to my life, but I will not mention it for the time being.. juz keep this a secret for the moment.. well dun bother asking me thru sms, msn or anything… I will not tell means will not tell.. haha.. so dun have to say so much haha.. but I am really thankful to this particular person.

I haven been happy for quite a long time after since.. but now at least for a while I am happy.. really thank you. Well but whether this happiness will last or not I also dunno.. coz I always feel that life is nv like fairy tail story. Indeed true, who does not like to be living in a fairy tale life.

Currently, I will juz end here for the while coz I cant think of wat to write lolx.. when I think of something I will update for this mth tt is.. haha :p